tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post3733636138866403922..comments2023-03-25T06:51:15.236-07:00Comments on Mad Madam Madeleine: Stating the ObviousAmberhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15252533513924257149noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-91432754505145285722009-10-07T10:21:58.090-07:002009-10-07T10:21:58.090-07:00Amber, I dont know if this will help, or not, but ...Amber, I dont know if this will help, or not, but I think that what you're feeling is the sign of being a good person and a wonderful mother. You experienced something unfathomably awful at Mad's 4 months: you don't want ANYONE to go through what you've been through. I, personally, think that is very noble. I think that it does GOOD for people to know Mad's story. Then they know to be on their toes, know to pay ATTENTION to things that don't seem right. And they know there is HOPE. That even if it is the worst of fears, it can be OK, or at least on the way to ok. I know that I held my breath at Adelaide's 4 month mark, and I have been more vigilant than I would have because I know Mad's story, but I am very THANKFUL for that caution ( not thankful for the Mad's circumstances that created it, however), and thankful that you and Ryan shared your, and Mad's, story with me. I think that anxiety you feel does good for other parents, although it is probably unhealthy for you. I imagine that you will always have a version of it for those you know at the 4 mo mark, but telling Mad's story might help alleviate the effects on you over time. At least I hope the HOPE from her life will provide some relief to you. Another thing I was thinking is that, as Mad and the other children you have met get older, they can help raise awareness, maybe you can help her do volunteer work as a teenager and later in college to get more companies involved in Childhood Cancer Awareness. Its the hope stories that help draw the public into Breast Cancr Awareness, and Mad can do that for Childhood cancer if she wants to. The more foundations, catchy ads, and companies that are made aware pf Childhood Cancer and the advancements they've made, the better. Maybe Mad and her friends, and you, can make the future brighter for awareness by telling their stories loud and clear. Either way, I think what you, Ryan, and she have accomplished is incredible, and you shouldn't ever feel you are, or have been, selfish or wrong for what you feel!Adelaide and Harleigh Morrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12081827920728213269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-8051701447260237442009-10-05T20:38:27.468-07:002009-10-05T20:38:27.468-07:00Hey A,
(thanks for the gifts, btw, got them tonig...Hey A,<br /><br />(thanks for the gifts, btw, got them tonight) <br /><br />I'm so sorry you feel like these feelings are invalid somehow. I can't pretend to know what it is you and Ryan have felt over the past couple of years in dealing with this, but I do know how intensely I love my kids. <br /><br />I CAN relate to your feelings regarding the 4 month mark, and I think it's completely normal. <br /><br />You have no frame of reference beyond that point except previous experience. When you do have another baby and as you struggle to get past that significant marker, I bet you will find the entire process healing even as it is difficult.<br /><br />Love.jocelynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14708175798322703642noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-60078271686847375302009-10-05T11:11:24.119-07:002009-10-05T11:11:24.119-07:00Amber - I also struggle with the fact that Pediatr...Amber - I also struggle with the fact that Pediatric Cancer Awareness Month is the month before the "Mother-Of-All-Awareness-Months" ... October. I feel like we get completely overshadowed before the calendar even turns to October! I saw so many pink ribbons last month, and although I did go to Chilis, where were all the gold ribbons? Where was the coverage in newspapers about events going on? I don't get it.<br /><br />And I don't think your thoughts makes you sound crazy at all! I can't fully relate, and I'd never say that I could (because I don't even have children, let alone one with pediatric cancer), however I somewhat know how you're feeling. I babysit a lot, and when one of the toddlers I sit for limps a little, or has a low grade fever for a few days, I get nervous too...<br /><br />I recently wrote a very loooong research paper titled "The Psychological Effects of Pediatric Cancer on the Family" and read a ridiculous amount of research on how having a child with pediatric cancer can affect each member of the family. Much of the research has shown that many mothers experience what is called "PTSS" or "Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome" - what I've gathered from reading the material is that it's basically like PTSD. However, it affects mothers in different ways, and some mothers don't experience it at all.<br /><br />Bottom line: whatever you are feeling is probably extremely common, and nothing to be ashamed of. You're entitled to your feelings! :)<br /><br />I'm just a student, so I don't know as much as a doctor might be able to tell you... but I just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents!<br /><br />And Madeleine looks SO CUTE in her halloween costume!!Kristenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03447502634166932762noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-48859303178366733202009-10-05T10:24:23.086-07:002009-10-05T10:24:23.086-07:00Glad to hear things are going well and hopefully y...Glad to hear things are going well and hopefully your anxiety starts to go away a bit. I know it's always a bit in the back of my mind, along with all the other things at different ages that have happens to kids of friends of mine. I think it's true, ignorance really is bliss, and parenthood is no shortage of tears and horrible fears, but luckily there's smiles and laughter too :)Beckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02305626809596011614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-87358992397677228302009-10-04T22:25:49.454-07:002009-10-04T22:25:49.454-07:00I was going to say exactly what Bree said as well-...I was going to say exactly what Bree said as well- I totally relate because every time somebody has their 20 week ultrasound I become anxious and part of me wants to tell them about how that was when I found out my baby wouldn't survive...but I know it would be totally inappropriate to do so. I think it's almost like post-traumatic stress syndrome!Jennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04692678638783793404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3773453750711754016.post-56483727878513996252009-10-04T20:42:36.712-07:002009-10-04T20:42:36.712-07:00I can totally relate. I want to tell everyone my s...I can totally relate. I want to tell everyone my story and about the fact that you can still lose your baby after the 1st trimester. Mad looks adorable in her Halloween costume. What a cutie!Breehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03894396436704042272noreply@blogger.com